The long-awaited magical festive season is here! Christmas is that time of the year when everyone reflects on how the whole year has been. Though it has a religious meaning, it is also about gift-giving, buying Christmas trees and, most importantly, time to spread love and cheer. What better way to do so than to share Christmas dad jokes with your family and friends?
A beautiful Christmas board decor. Photo: pexels.com, @George Dolgikh (modified by author)
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Christmas dad jokes to get you into the holiday spirit
Christmas is a season to have fun. Nothing soothes the soul like a good laugh. Make an effort to make people around you as happy as possible during this holiday season. One of the best ways to make this happen is to share Christmas dad jokes on cards and in person.
Christmas dad jokes to get you into the holiday spirit
Christmas is the time of year when Christians celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. It’s the perfect time to remind your loved ones about how important they are to you. These Christmas dad jokes will get you into the holiday spirit.
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Best holiday dad jokes
Christmas is a day for putting a smile on the faces of your loved ones. Express your affection to them by sending one of these dad jokes about Christmas.
How did the ornament get addicted to Christmas? He has been hooked on trees his whole life.What did the salt say to the pepper on Christmas? Seasonings greetings!What happened to the man who stole an advent calendar? He got 25 days!How do you wish a dog Merry Christmas? Feliz Navi-dog.What do fish sing during the holidays? Xmas carols.What should you expect at the end of Christmas Day? The letter Y.Why do mummies like Christmas so much? They’re into all the wrapping.What do you call festive ducks? Christmas quackers.What did Adam say the day before Christmas? It’s Christmas Eve!What do you call blind reindeer? I have no eye deer.What did the beaver say when it saw the Christmas tree? It said, nice gnawing you.What do the elves call it when Father Christmas claps his hands at the end of a play? Santapplause!What would you get if you crossed a Christmas special decorative plant and a frog? A mistle-toad.Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber? It needed to be trimmed!How did Scrooge win the football game? Because the ghost of Christmas passed.What is the best Christmas present in the world? A broken drum, you just can’t beat it!Where do you find reindeer? I don’t know; It depends on where you left them.Christmas! The time when everyone gets santamental.What is a Christmas tree’s favourite candy? Orna-mints!Why are Christmas trees so fond of the past? Because the present’s beneath them.Why is it always so cold during Xmas? Because it is Decembrrrrrrrr.
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Christmas dad jokes for kids
A lit Christmas tree and gifts by the chimney. Photo: pexels.com, @Brett Sayles (modified by author)
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Even with all the fun Christmas activities in December, sometimes the only thing better than all the festivities is sharing laughs with our loved ones. Here is a collection of December dad jokes for kids.
What did Frosty’s girlfriend give him when she was mad at him? The cold shoulder.Why are mummies such big fans of Christmas? Because they enjoy wrapping.What do donkeys send out near Christmas? Mule-tide greetings.How did the reindeer learn to play the piano? He was self-taught.What do gingerbread men use when they break their legs? Candy canes.What is green, covered in Christmas lights and Christmas bulbs, and goes ribbit? A mistle-toad.Why is everyone thirsty at the North Pole? No well.How did Joseph and Mary weigh baby Jesus at birth? They had a weigh in the manger.What did the snowman say to the aggressive carrot? “Get out of my face.”Why did the scarecrow get a big Christmas bonus? Because he was outstanding in his field.What would you give a dog as a present for Christmas? The best gift would be a mobile bone.Why did the Little Drummer Boy put his drum to bed? It was beat.What is a vegan’s favourite Christmas song? Soy to the World!What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.How do sheep say Merry Christmas to each other? Fleece Navidad.Why did Rudolph have to attend summer school? Because he went down in history.What do you call someone who can’t stop talking about last Christmas? Santa-mental!What did the wise men say after they offered up their gifts of gold and frankincense? Wait, there’s myrrh.What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney? Claus-trophobia!What did the reindeer say before telling a joke to the comedy show? He said this one’s going to sleigh you.What is it called when a snowman has a temper tantrum? A meltdown.
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Funny Christmas dad jokes
A Santa Claus plus toy on a brown background. Photo: pexels.com, @Daniel Reche (modified by author)
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Christmas is the season of joy, and there is no more joyful sound than laughter. Here are one-liner Christmas dad jokes to make your holiday memorable.
What are the best Christmas sweaters made from? Fleece Navidad.What do you call Santa’s little helpers? Subordinate clauses.Elves use what kind of money? Jingle bills.Why is a Christmas tree so bad at knitting? They have too many needles!What do you call an old snowman? Water.Where does Santa keep all his money? At the local snow bank.Who delivers Christmas presents to cats and dogs? Santa Paws.Who is never hungry at Christmas? The turkey is always stuffed.What do you call a reindeer ghost? Cari-boo!Who is Santa’s favourite singer? Elf-is, Presley.Why is it getting harder to buy Advent calendars? Their days are numbered!How do Christmas trees get ready for a party? They spruce up!Why don’t reindeer like picnics? Because of all their ant-lures.What’s the favourite Christmas carol of every new parent? Silent night.Why does Santa have three gardens? So he can ho ho ho!Where do little trees go to become Christmas trees? Elementree school!What’s Santa’s favourite candy? Jolly Ranchers.What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsel-itis!Where do elves go to vote? The North Poll.What does the queen call her Christmas broadcast? The One Show!Why don’t crabs celebrate Xmas? Because they’re shellfish.
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Santa dad jokes
An adorable snowman ornament on a Christmas tree. Photo: pexels.com, @Vladimir Srajber (modified by author)
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The festive season brings people together. It is the perfect time of year to extend heartfelt greetings to others. Here is a collection of Christmas jokes that are actually funny to here.
What would you call Santa if he went bankrupt? He’d be called Saint Nickel-less.What’s Santa’s tax status? Elf-employed.Why does Santa use GPS? He doesn’t want to be a lost Claus.What is Santa Claus’ laundry detergent of choice? Yule-Tide.Famous friends, which of Santa’s friends is the most chill? Jack Frost.Where does Santa stop for coffee? Star-bucks.A Christmas breakfast. What breakfast do Santa and his wife like to eat together? Mistle-toast.How can you tell that Santa is real? You can sense his presents whenever he comes.Why did Santa go to the liquor store? He was looking for holiday spirits.What is Santa’s favourite pizza? One that’s deep-pan, crisp and even!What does Mrs Claus sing to Santa on his birthday? Freeze a jolly good fellow!What is the nationality of Santa Claus? He is North Pole-ish.How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing. It was on the house!Santa Jackson, what goes oh-oh-oh? Santa was walking backwards.What do you call Santa living at the South Pole? A lost clause!What’s as big as Santa but weighs nothing? Santa’s shadow!Which of Santa’s reindeer has bad manners? Rude-olph.When someone delivers a package to Santa, what do they do? Ring the jingle bell.What name does Santa use to check in at hotels on beach vacations? Sandy Claus.What does Santa do when his elves misbehave? He gives them the sack!Why does Santa always enter through the chimney? Because it soots him.
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Bad dad Christmas jokes
A close-up of Christmas decorations hanging on a thread. Photo: pexels.com, @Ma Boîte A Photos (modified by author)
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Dad jokes are typically bad yet funny jokes that a dad tells the family. Below is a list of the jokes you might find fit to share with your loved ones.
How many presents can Santa fit in an empty sack? Only one. After one present, it is not empty anymore.What do you call a child who doesn’t believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus.How does Santa remember all the fireplaces he’s visited? He keeps a log.Why doesn’t Santa go to the hospital? He has private elf care.Why did Mrs Claus get mad at Santa? Because her husband was a flake.Why did no one bid for Rudolph and Blitzen on eBay? Because they were two deer!What did Santa say to the smoker? Please don’t smoke; it isn’t good for my elf!What do you get if Santa forgets to wear his underpants? Saint Knickerless!How is Christmas exactly like your job? You do all the work, and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit.Why do reindeer like Beyoncé so much? She sleighs.What’s the most popular Christmas wine? “I don’t like Brussels sprouts!”What do you get if you cross Santa with a detective? Santa Clues!What says Oh Oh Oh? Santa walking backward.What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when a fire is lit? Krisp Kringle.What do elves post on social media? Elf-ies.Who is Santa’s favourite singer? Elf-is Presley.Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing? They always drop their needles.Why did Santa’s helper see a therapist? Because he had low self-esteem.What’s every elf’s favourite type of music? Wrap!What’s the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet? The Christmas alphabet has Noel.Who is never hungry at Christmas? The turkey — he’s always stuffed.
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Corny dad Christmas jokes
A Santa Claus ornament beside brown bauble decor. Photo: pexels.com, @Susanne Jutzeler, suju-foto (modified by author)
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Christmas dad jokes are the perfect way to get into the holiday mood. Consider writing one of these silly Christmas jokes on a card and sending it to your loved ones.
Who delivers Christmas presents to sharks? Santa Jaws.What did one Christmas tree say to another? Lighten up!What reindeer game do reindeers play at sleepovers? Truth or deer.How does a snowman lose weight? He waits for the weather to get warmer!How do sheep wish each other happy holidays? Merry Christmas to ewe.Why is a foot a good Christmas present? Because it makes a good stocking filler.What type of cars do the elves of Santa Claus drive? Toy-otas.What do you get when you combine a Christmas tree with an iPad? A pineapple!Did you hear that Santa knows karate? He has a black belt.How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming? He refers to his calen-deer. What did one snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?What is Santa’s favourite place to deliver presents? Idaho-ho-ho.Who is Santa’s favourite actor? Willem Dafoe-ho-ho.Why do Donner and Blitzen get to take so many coffee breaks? Because they are Santa’s star bucks!What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? The abdominal snowman.How does Santa Claus take photos with the good kids? Well, he does it with a Pole-roid camera.Who does Santa call when his sleigh breaks down? The Abominable Towman.What do you call Santa when he’s on a break? A Santa pause.What did the English teacher call Santa’s helpers? Subordinate clauses.What was Santa’s favourite subject in school? Chemis-tree!What was the Christmas tree’s favourite subject in high school? Treegonometree!
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The above Christmas dad jokes will brighten your festive season. You can also use them to design your Christmas cards to get your family into the holiday spirit. Merry Christmas to you and your loved ones!
Henzodaily.ng recently published a list of positive Monday morning blessings to send to your loved ones. Many people dread Mondays, including working adults and students.
While resuming work and studies after a weekend is hardly ever welcomed, Monday can be a great day to refocus and push for your goals. It is a great day to dive into your tasks and get a head start on the week.
Source: Henzodaily.ng